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BIZARRE NEWS Let your friends and family members get a taste of Bizarre, forward them THIS copy and tell them to subscribe! Visit... http://www.bizarrenews.com/3.html ------------------------------------------------------------ Greetings Fellow Bizarros: We have a new entry to file under the "Disgusting Personal Records" category. In 2000 we introduced you to a drink called Khoona. This delicate aperitif is drunk by fgani tribesmen on their wedding night and consists of a small amount of still-warm "very recently obtained" bull semen. It is believed to be a potent aphrodisiac. In 2001 Bizarre News readers were treated to the story of Taiwan martial arts expert Tu Chin-sheng. Chin-sheng and his students are practitioners of Chiu Chiu Shen Gong, or the "penis-hanging art." They created a new world record last year when three of them pulled a truck loaded with 100 men with their penises. [I saw pictures, folks.] This year 20 of them plan to pull a Boeing 747 in a similar fashion. I'll keep you updated on that one. But the latest tale of personal achievement comes from the Great White North. 23-year-old Nathan Robitaille of Ontario, Canada has recently broken the world record for the most number of concurrent body piercings. The old record was held by a North Carolina man who earned Guinness book recognition with 301 needles. Nathan shattered that number with a skin- crawling 420 needles stuck under his skin. It took more than three hours to do the piercings and required the use of both of Nathan's arms up to his shoulders. "Some spots are worse than others," Robitaille said, as more needles were stuck into his arm. "On my forearm it's not too bad, but on my shoulders it's pretty intense." As a matter of course Bizarre News warns its readers that these stunts are performed by experienced idiots and should not be attempted by anyone at home. Bizarrely, Lewis +-------------------- Bizarre Holidays --------------------+ April is . . . . National Anxiety Month April is . . . . National Humor Month April 1 is. . . One Cent Day April 3 is . . . Don't Go To Work Unless It's Fun Day April 7 is . . . No Housework Day April 9 is . . . Name Yourself Day April 11 is . . . Eight-Track Tape Day April 13 is . . . Blame Somebody Else Day April 17 is . . . National Cheeseball Day April 19 is . . . Garlic Day April 23 is . . . World Laboratory Animal Day April 24 is . . . National Pigs In A Blanket Day April 28 is . . . Kiss-Your-Mate Day
PARIS, France - Five teenagers decided to make a statement by posing
nude for the cover of their high school's student magazine called "Ravaillac."
The issue dealt with sex, pro- stitution, homophobia, and pornography,
but some parents, teachers, and students simply don't care what statement
the kids were trying to make. Some believe that the students have disgraced
the 200-year-old prestigious French school. Many prominent people have
attended the Henri-IV school in the past, including former President Georges
Pompidou as a teacher. Though the students posed nude, the magazine was
published with bits of removable opaque tape stuck to the photo. The teenagers
have sought legal advice for fear of the school board's actions. The magazine's
production has ------------------------------------------------------------ Look no further! Get your very own USA Beret and SAVE $5! For a limited
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supplies are limited. Sorry due to the demand, there is a limit of 5 * LONDON, England - Like any good citizen, a suspicious neighbor called the police when he saw a man loitering around his friend's van. Due to doubt, laziness, or who knows why, the police chose NOT to send a patrol car to the scene. Instead, they asked to speak with the alleged troublemaker. The loitering man assured the police he meant no harm, and the case was closed - until later when it was discovered the man actually stole $1,000 worth of tools from the van. The police force claims to have been "overstretched" the night of the crime and say the situation was "extremely embarrassing...I was appalled by the story," said one Manchester Police spokesman. One of the owners of the van, Carole Curley, was adamant about the negligence and said, "This is an absolute disgrace. A crime was being committed and police could not send anyone out."
BELGIUM - An unusual collection of 12 mini-penises, some dressed and
wearing hats, was recently found at the City Museum for Actual Arts in
Gent. Though the museum accumulates an odd assortment of crafts and art,
Director Jan Hoet said the penises "were not part of our usual collection."
Of course not. They were actually purposely placed there by a manipulative
artist named Rudy Meganck to get his name know. The "artist"
came forth and claimed the collection four days later. Only by that time,
it had been taken away by
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The National Labor Relations Board held hearings last week on charges
by a Miami nursing home that a union used voodoo to organize its employees.
The employees at the Mt. Sinai-St. Francis Nursing and Rehabilitation
Center are mostly Haitians, as are many of the union organizers. During
the hearing,
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BAY SHORE, New York - Peeking inside a 5-inch mortar tube after an aerial bomb failed to launch properly proved deadly for a man during a neighborhood party. Keith Seymour, 34, was killed after a charge went off while he was looking inside the mortar tube to see why the explosive failed to fire. According to the Suffolk County police, the intensity of the blast partially decapitated Seymour. The accident remains under investigation.
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>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>READER COMMENTS<<<<<<<<<<<<<< Lewis, although the AB MAXIMIZER is a terrific product, that provides
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Well, that is a wrap for Bizarre News. How did we do?
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